JB ShooOooping!

JB Shopping

went shopping with him at JB as planned earlier.

i asked him to accompany me earlier but after yesterday's outing, i thought my heart is not strong enough to meet him again.

His indifference, his coolness, like nothing had happened...
mabbe he's pretending..
but it pierced right into my heart deeply..
Pain and sadness overpowered the anger in me.. i'm not angry anymore.
But too late.

I still want to meet him, even though my eyes are still swollen from last night.

so we met lar.. as expected..

with his fren, pat. initially we are supposed to meet at 12pm. But i woke up late and eyes still veri swollen.. so we pushed back to 1pm. Actualli, i told him i do not wanna meet le giving some excuses. But somehow, my msg got misinterpreted and i do not have the heart to repeat again.

at kranji, pat realised he forgot to take his passport.

Best liao.

Have to wait for him to go home and take.
And hey! that's a good chance for me!

But apparently, i'm over-sad and over-demoralised le. i couldnt do anything except staring into blank space. ys.. the ben ben girl..

it din go on smoothly. Main reason is i'm still veri sad. Everything looks so gloomy to me.

Actually, while we were at city square's FOS, he and pat are looking for guys clothes. I have to look for my clothes on my own.

Suddenly, images from the past came back.

And i turned to look at him with pat... happily shopping.. enjoying each other company...
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while i'm alone with all the ugly clothes ard me...

How cud i not be sad?
How cud i not feel anything?
How cud i not feel like giving up?

The sadness is overwhelming.

I wanted veri much to go back to singapore alone rather than to see his indifferent face again.

i was at the entrance walking in and out..

No one noticed.

Alright. nvm, since clothes at FOS are ugly and there's really no difference from shopping all alone at that time, I went off to mango to shop without informing -ok my fault.

I shd have bitten my lips with tears in eyes and inform him. Ok, I wun do it again. Becuz he din like it.. but more imptly, it's irresponsible.

Good is that things get better after we boarded the shuttle bus from pelangi. Cus I managed to molest hold his arm. muahhaa.. I hope he wasnt irritated by me.

I was veri happie.

But fools like me also noe he shd be juz trying to minimise the pain in me. I can't afford to give myself false hopes. Anyway, thanks for being nice.

So, i'm happier. Inform him i wanna go mango shop shop before he and pat went to look at
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the clocks lar.

eh wat were u guys thinking?!.. haha

Bought one skirt and pants at veri cheap prices.. both cost less than SGD50!! muahaha.. shopping kills the pain in me for a moment, temporarily.
It helps more here cuz the prices are low so there's no more heartpain in terms of my pocket..

While trying to hail cab to tanah sentosa for dinner, he touched gave a gentle push on my back at times.. jus like the past.
I even hallucinated that he forgot and wanted to hold my hand.

yea, ys pls stop dreaming. Can't believe i observed such little actions. & does he observe too?

Anyway! the seafood there is dirt cheap and yummy!

Dun think abt the hygenie can le. And DONT drink too much. It's not a good experience to visit their loos after a meal.. u geddit?

ok, well it ends nicely. Thank god.

things like this may or may not happen again.

i hope it will and i'll be able to hold his hands. -ok sorry, i'm mad.

I'm gonna cry less tonight. ^__^